“My Broken Bone,” A Cringeworthy Story

The semester is almost over for me, and for one class we had to give an oral business presentation today. (I’m taking business communications 1.) The presentation could be about marketing, businesses and their histories or human resources; because our class is about communication in BUSINESS.

That would be pretty straight forward, right?

I would have thought so too.

Not according to one of my fellow students who decided to tell us his emotional and distressing time of when he broke his leg and later his parents “ditched” him.

I shit you not.

I’m going to call this idiotic student Joe, which may or may not be his actual name.

So, Joe started off his so-called “business” presentation by talking about how playing hockey was his entire life and what teams he played for and what position he was. (Right wing.) At the beginning, I thought this was some beginning to a marketing presentation on hockey of some sort.

But no, I was wrong. His ENTIRE presentation was about him surviving the ordeal of breaking his leg while he was playing hockey, and to only find out his parents were leaving him to volunteer at the Olympics.

Ok, so number one, his parents never ditched him, obviously they had planned to volunteer at the Olympics long before his broken bone incident. Nobody just drops all their shit at once and flies off to another country to volunteer. Well some people can, but not most.

Two, how does this have anything to do with breaking his leg? These seem like two separate points that have nothing in common.

As if that was ridiculous enough, he had a conclusion slide, as if that was needed, which it wasn’t.

His conclusion?

  1. If you’re a parent, don’t ditch your kid.
  2. Don’t break a bone, especially your leg.

 

Dude, why? What the hell were you smoking? This just doesn’t make any sense.

And to wrap all this up, let us take a look at this very deep, meaningful and above all “business” related slide:

bone

Ok, so he “had to take the bus to school.” Heavens! So do I, just like everyone else who doesn’t have their own damn car.

“I was in a wheel chair.” He spelt wheelchair wrong.

“My parents ditched me.” As explained above, they never ditched him as he had many other family members to look after him while they were volunteering.

I guess I really wish I asked Joe if this has been his most traumatic event in his life, because if it is, he better consider himself fucking lucky.

 

 

 

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